blog come back!

Done with all the applications and dorm shit, the only thing
i have to worry about is the boxes and the packing i have to do..
i recently sent all the tuition to RISD, and they sent me back a
package saying that i have to do a Liberal Arts portion with 42 credits
during my freshmen year in RISD...and that really pissed me off
cuz some of the classes they required was the classes i took before in NMC
such as: Introduction of Sociology
College English Composition 1 (EN101)
American Nations II
Introduction to Psychology
Principles of Democratics
thats all i remember for now. so i went to NMC to pick up my official transcript,
oh, i first went to NMA to see Mr. Kodep to ask what i can do, because
i wasn't sure if i needed to send it out (i mean what if they don't even
accept my credits that i took in NMC. i didn't want to use my $20 in getting the transcript...im lyk really broke rite now..lol) so he sent out a fax telling
the lady "Ms. Sweeney" who was responsible for the Liberal Arts notifying her
that i already took classes here and wanting her to accept my credits.
after that it was all approved, Ms. Sweeney wanted the official transcript
so i went to NMC>then to the post office today...
sigh, i hope the school accepts my credits...i mean that would be really
easier for me to survive the tight, hectic semester in RISD..
i heard from people that my school is one of the schools that are really harsh to
freshmens in general...lyk all the shit we have to do during our first year...

My room mate is a Turkish 18 year old girl and i am so glad that
my room mate is not Korean.. (since i really don't like my race..haha LOL)
i can't wait till i meet her and my new surrounding environment i would be living in!
this is the first time im actually living off by myself..!
sorry to say this, and i know this would really make my parents disappointed...but
i have waited so long for this freedom!!!!!! i've always wanted to live by myself
and i can't wait!!!!! i mean i know its really going to be hard but hey,
i think i can do it!

fist of all, i need to do something with my love life...
it hasn't been going on well..
i am definitely have some problems and i totally feel like a bitch right now..
now i mean it....calling myself a bitch..its not like the sarcastic shit i always did..
(sorry if it sounded nothing sarcastic....hahah)
anyhow i am really excited in general with my life!!! X-D

'Hello June

things haven't been working the way i planne but
hey, that's why life is so exciting to live bcuz
there are way too much drama and unexpected things
that happen that makes it thrilling rather than boring

at times it is really tiring..all the drama and unimportant
shits i get from people but it's all good.
recenty i have been going to gold's gym to work out
the 10 day pass thingy..thats $50. I saw Seung hee..but
i didn't have the chance to say hello cus i was worried
if he didn't remember me.
during my freshmen year he was one hella funny/perverted oppa
he was definitely fun to hang out with him but he changed so much
no physically but in different ways..
maybe physcially too.. cus he got buffer..bt his face was
noticable..before he always had that joking, child-like smile on
now i don't see that anymore. he grew up and now he looks like a man..
for some reason...everytime i try to say hello to him theres this
wierd awkward-ness all of the sudden
which even makes it more harder for me to say hello...

today was suppose to be vianka's good-bye party but it didn' turn out the way
all the remaining nmaers had planned...(remaining as Tomo, Luis, me, Kaito,and Kaba)
there are also other people that i havent listed on the remaining nma list
but thats becus Im not sure if there are here or not..
anyhow. my parents were having a bbq tonite at my house cuz
this "uncle" (he looked pretty young) got married and came to honeymoon to Saipan
(hes from my mom's side. but I have never saw him. and this is the first time)
I never knew I had far far uncle. after the bbq me, tomo, my brother, luis and Kaba
all went down to big dipper for icecream.

vianka take care and i love you so much
you were one hella good best friend and i hope we get in touch.
im sorry for what had happened today and recently the past few monthes..
and im also so sorry that i couldn't be there for you when you really
needed me the most.
Good-bye my friend and take care.
I wish for the best always for you,my wifey! :^)

another post

ah, summer break has started
and yes, my gpa fell and i still have to send out stuffs to RISD
oh, to people who haven't noticed, i am not going to parsons
as i have planned. and yes, it is my dream school but right now
im not sure if i am ready for fashion design. so im going to this
art school in Rhode Island its called Rhode Island School of Design
its the number one school for art school. better than Yale University
(at least thats what i heard) still don't know why they accepted me
and i still do feel like i don't deserve this, but why i am very thankful
that i did get accepted! there are many reasons why i changed my plans
and it was definitely a hard decision because it is more far away from
Seattle...i mean New York is also far away from Seattle but closer than
Rhode Island..(yes, im seeing K again..to let you guys know..im in a
"friends for benefit" stage with him haha LOL)

anyhow second, i wanted to experience an urban life since i am from a small place
and thats one of the reasons why i was planning to go to New York but
my plans have changed....im stuck in this quiet (at least quiet-er than New York right?) place..not that i hate quiet places..its just that i wanted to experience
something new and exciting but i guess not.
at least new york is 45 minutes away. i can visit ?

to tell you the truth i have many plans this summer..
first i am planning to visit K around septemberish or august...
which one, either way..
the important part: (shhhh...its a secret)
without telling my parents that i am visiting...
although my parents do know that we did see each other like 1 year ago
(since i told my dad after the break-up) but i didn't tell them recently
that i have been seeing him again..(this time long-distance. Sorry dad about the cell-phone bills..i was too lazy to buy a card..haha LOL i hope you notice the phone bills after i leave to Korea..plz)
anyhow....so my parents totally don't know that we are seeing each other agian..
and it is a total crime for me to change the ticket to Rhode Island to Seattle
im not gonna live there, but maybe a one week visit before school starts.
and its really secretive and risky..cuz im not sure how im gonna do this but
it is definitely gonna happen.....LOL
i don't even know where this courage came from but i miss him so much
from the 1 year apart period.

around June-July im going to be at Korea..probably taking art classes
with my brother in the same portfolio academy i spent almost all my precious break..
don't worry, its not gonna be that massive like before.. only 3 times a week..
mann compared to before thats little!
then, im probably gonna take yoga classes or any exercise so that i can shed some pounds that i gained from all the finals.....
im also gonna club alot and see friends that i haven't been hanging out due to too much school events and work...

am i excited? yah..if only i dont fail mr. wicksman's EN 202 class.
shit i chose the wrong teacher..i think..
this is bullshit..but i hope and pray i do pass his class.......hahahah

i know, im back

finals are finally over by tomorrow for me,
and yes, i am very excited.
for the past few 3 weeks i have been sleeping less amount of time
i slept like at 3 am morning everyday.

im finally over highschool.
i have so waited for this freedom
one step of becoming a complete, mature human being
there are at times when i miss being childish, and immature
but at times it is really tiring
when i see people who just can't grow up and do things
that are only for grade school kids.
hey, but what can you say, huh? that's just the way some people are.
they mature late and i don't blame them for that
but it is at times ridiculous to see a physically grown up person
act like a 1 year old.

in a short period of time, i have grown up so much
the way i think, the way i treat others,
and whenever i think about others before me
i feel like i did grown so much
i still have a selfish side in me but im slowly getting rid of it.
after all,
if i think about it, a true friend and a family is someone who
can be there for me when i really needed them. people who can actually
accept you the way you are. without the fakeness and the public image

when i stretched my arms for help,
the people who are the "true" friends are always ready to embrace
the brittle, fragile, breakable soul and help me become a better person
they will love the way i am and i would in return.

at times i do lack people like that
but i am thankful that i at least have some.
because there are some people who don't have anyone who they can trust
although it is not safe to trust a human being 100%
we tend to do it still

new environment, new people, and new me.
i might not make friends right away and i am not that good with
making new friends but i can definitely be someone who can be there
when someone really needs me.
i might not be the best friend but i can be a truthful, honest, benign friend

just show me that you are not fake and i'll show you me
in like non-stop.
i may hurt you by my harsh, truthful critiques
but hey, it's all for your own good
so don't take it personally.

sorry, im just excited for another journey of my life
Rhode Island here i come :^)

Yesterday

yesterday was quite a day cuz I went on a "date" with eun ji
we planned it day before but i didnt ask my parents advance because
i wasn't sure if it was going to happen..and then eun ji called around 11ish
when my parents just arrived home from their work to eat lunch
then i told my parents that i was going out to eat and
as usual they were not happy about it
my parents have this thingy going on where they don't want to share
their kids with other people. they just want to keep us with them
and have no contact with others...
it's sort of a parent disease or something..
and it sometimes suffocates me
cuz i miss alot of fun because of that..
i mean they are TOO obsessed with us
i get the fact that they are doing this cuz they are my parents but
when it goes over the limit....man..then it sux
i mean you can tell how obsessed they are
by just talking to them for 10 minutes
my dad wants to have 7 different cameras in my dorm just to
check up on me..it sounds freaky? well imagine being the daughter....heh
and oh- it's serious..cuz he already have 10 different cameras in his store
so that he can check anytime when he's at home..
we actually watch people in my store which is located in Tanapag
and my house is all the way in Kobler....so yah...nice huh?
anyway..i did get out from house to eun jis' but it took hellotta time to do so
i had to wait 30 minutes, just to see if it was okay..
we went to moomin's and eun ji ate ramen set
and i ordered fried kimchi and pork...it wasnt that bad i guess?
after that we were wandering around dfs like tourists
and then we went to pena's to see what they had for new arrivals..but
eventually..they didn't have any arrivals..so we went all they way to garapan
to eat ice cream. theres this place called yellow mango
and their yogert icecream with fruits are so gooooooooooood!
i only ate it cuz eun ji was so full
then we called masa and luis what they were up to
and they were swimming at the beach behind aquaris
so we went there and i met yugo for the first time..
well i saw him in ayaka's blog but that was only in a pic
he looked like an aristocrat....some guy from a rich family cuz he was so pale..
masa made fun of me that i was more white then yugo...wtf?
but yah..it was an interesting day
tomo seemed really happy so i was happy too
eh-heh spring break is almost over....sigh....

K left to Seattle like yesterday or something...

and other than that nothin much..

i have to save up some money cuz i need to buy

birthday presents.....ahhhhhhh! i use way too much money on food..

anyhow so how's everyone? Ayaka? Chett?

I haven't heard lot from you

and oh, aya? did u get my email???

Hakuna Matata

it means no worries :^)



I just love disney characters <3

&, "♥♥♥☻スキねこ."; marry me said:

What have I been up to?:
♥these days I am addicted to Nate On (this Korean msn-thingy)
I think I can chatt for days and days ...this things is really crazy


let's sex-up the atmosphere! 님의 말 :
그런점에선 고마워
let's sex-up the atmosphere! 님의 말 :
너도 나 그런거할만큼 안좋아했으니까 안한거니까
i know death is inevitable. 님의 말 :
아니
i know death is inevitable. 님의 말 :
너가
i know death is inevitable. 님의 말 :
전나
i know death is inevitable. 님의 말 :
싫어
i know death is inevitable. 님의 말 :
하니까
i know death is inevitable. 님의 말 :
안한건데
i know death is inevitable. 님의 말 :
아니였으면
i know death is inevitable. 님의 말 :
했겠지 ....
let's sex-up the atmosphere! 님의 말 :
만약에
let's sex-up the atmosphere! 님의 말 :
너가
let's sex-up the atmosphere! 님의 말 :
나한테 하자고했음
let's sex-up the atmosphere! 님의 말 :
나 했을지도몰라
let's sex-up the atmosphere! 님의 말 :
나그땐 너 그만큼 조아했어


I was madly in love with this guy and I almost gave up my virginity
but I didn't because I was a bit coward at that time
but I have no regrets whats so ever cuz we broke up eventually
We broke up eventually but we still talk about really random shits still..
I'm not sure if that's a good thing or bad...hmm but it makes me happy so
I think it's a good thing... :)

♥another thing I have been doing is watching a lot of Korean and Japanese dramas
on Crunchyroll...i think I have been doing that all spring break...
I recently watched all of gokusen...(I know it's really old...but i'm catching up! >w<)
im done watching gokusen 1, and Noda is soooooooooooo X100 cute!!!! ahhh!!
and..uhh..i stopped watching I'm sorry, I love you..
this is a Korean drama but really really sad..actually this is my second time watching
cuz so jisub is so hot in here XD yay

♥another thing, I have been accepted into Parsons New School of Design in New York
so...yah..I got their letter like 2 weeks ago but I actually got the actual packet 3 days ago..
im looking through it...and yes, im excited but..still not sure if this is the right thing..
i have alot in mind right now..cuz if i try to visit to Seattle every week..thats impossible..
well..huh...at least I got accepted into my dream school! yay

how is my spring break?:
♥nothing much?? i was planning to study and do alot of missing hws that i didn't turn in
for mr. wicksman's english class but that didn't work out as i planned cuz so far
i only did one..and my spring break ends this week...(it seemed like it just started!!!>:^( )
so basically im screwed...and oh, i was going to study for math too..cuz im literally failing
but ...that didn't work out too?? i don't know..these days im not sure what's up with me..eh-heh

im sorry

gummy거미 feat. TOP -미안해요 (me-an-hea-yo)

-

thank you for your concerns
and also I definitely know that all of you care for me
and are worried about me


but, I'm the one who's making all the choice
and no matter how many times I tell myself
this isn't the right way, right person
I just want it so badly that I really don't care
if I get hurt again


Thanks though, for caring for someone
really worthless
I really appreciate it
and I feel so happy and thankful that at least
I have someone like you guys


I've tried so hard
went through so much
but it's useless

I hope you guys know that I tried so hard to get over
this one person but you know what guys?
It's just impossible
It's already beem a year
and while trying to get over this relationship
I was torturing myself
forcingly erasing all the memories
but the more I do that
I constantly go back to it and try to live and stay there

Long Time No See

Am I the slut or are the boys just perverted?

This other day I went to pick up my brother in this
really cute outfit. (the uniform outfit) with this cute heels that
Mrs. Arriola sed was cute rite?
and I got all the perverted look from the guys
................................................................................uh......
....................................wtf...............................................?


My brother told me I looked like a slut..but actually
I don't see how that outfit was slutty..
IT WAS WHAT I USUALLY WEAR
so...are you calling me I'm a whore...or..
is it just the guys with the perverted-ness?
I'm seriously changing what I wear...seriously...

URGH...

Hello Earthians?

Suki is back !
well, sorta...
THANK GOD AYAKA GOT HER PRESENT..cuz the whole time
I was gonna send letters out to her but since I haven't been
hearing from her whether her present was there or not..
I didn't want my letters to go to the wrong ppl so I waited a long time
and I NO LONGER HAVE TO WAIT!!!!

Ugh...I was wasted the other day
me, kaba, yuika,vianka, and eunji did the "girls nite out thingy"
but it didn't turn out the way I planned it cuz I was pissed off
with some kind of reason (not gonna tell cuz there are hell lota
people who read my blog and I don't want others to know..eh-heh)
well so I wasn't planning to drink alot rite? but I did
and I so needed to smoke cuz the fucken atmosphere was freggin awkward..
after smoking I felt little light headed so I started to drink more
then everyone left except eun ji and vi
so I planned to smoke another cig
well..................I was gonna smoke only one and just sleep
but the whole tipsy-ness just made me emotional I GUESS???
(I'm telling this embarrassing story of mine cuz everyone knows since "SOMEONE"
wanted to be a big cheap blabber mouth and told everyone about it..)
which I am fucken pissed off about cuz now everyone who wasn't in the damn
party know about what happened from the start to the end....
which is fucked up cuz come on, people make fucken mistakes..
thats why WE ARE HUMANS? and why would u talk about things like that
should be kept in as a secret?? huh? are you that fucken stupid, who fucken don't know
what should be sed in public and not? well I HOPED NOT, but this person
I hypothesis did..

Well I'm fucken sorry I had to ruin the whole fucken atmosphere okay?
Im sorry I had to be the wet blanket in my own party
I'm fucken sorry I had to throw up
but seriously some things should be just kept in
KNOW THE LIMITS BITCH FOR GODS SAKE...
you're cheap mouth just pisses the fuck
and since I planned to be open about it, i'll straight foward tell
"I DO NOT LIKE WHAT YOU DID, telling everyone"
maybe thats also another reason why I don't like you
because you tend to be always on my nerves acting like you really know me
Jesus christ, well enough of the whole pissy offy ....
I'm over bitching about it, and thank you for reading my bitching

I didn't want my whole comeback blog to be talking trash about
this person but oh well,

this is me before going all tipsy
when I was still okay. and not that emotional


Sorry earthians, I tend to go over the limit when something pisses me off
I say alot of harsh things that I actually mean..
what can you say, I mean this is me...
and oh this isn't actually "talking shit" because I actually can
say it right in front of the person's face...but trying to be a bit nice?
well that was my crazy nite/weekend

Heh, I love it when parents are off island X-D

임재범 너를위해

it's kinda wierd when you thought everyone changed
and the whole time it's so hard for me to get use to it...
but when you think about it,
it was actually me who changed a lot.
Hearing the same song, looking at the same person
actually it was me, who haven't been realizing that
it wasn't anyone who changed but me, myself

Was it that hard to just look at the mirror to know that..
I don't know..but it took a hell lotta time for me to figure that out
It is sad, when you see another you in the mirror staring back at you
"hi, who the fuck are you?"

the new me, I guess many people are use to
is actually someone that I am not use to
It is the direct opposite of myself...

What I have got into is something that I shouldn't have got into
Whenever I try to rewind it back to where it started,
the tape itself just tangles, that it is hard for me to untangle it again
it's just back to the place where I started, the ruined

Myspace freak

I finally became a myspace freak..
The whole time..I kind didn't like myspace
cuz it was too complicated..(all the codes and stuff..)
It felt like there was no way what so ever for me to do that
so the whole time I kinda didn't do much on myspace
(well sometimes, my brother changed my layouts to really corny ones
cuz he got bored..yah..he knows my password) but that was it..
anyhow....I felt like I was missing out with the 2k7 people..
people like mina....I finally got in touch with her!
yay!! and at the same time I think I became an addict....
.......I have a blogger, cyworld, and a myspace...what the hell




I don't know what's goin on with me..
At the smae time when I became a lonely,
I started to put more time into cyber stuff..which is sad...

Life would be great

Wouldn't life be perfect if everyone had a valentine,
sweatpants were sexy,
Monday's were fun, junk food didn't make you fat,
girls didn't cause any drama,guys weren't so confusing,
nothing was regettable, you didn't have to lose the people you love,
friendship didn't fade, and good bye only meant 'till tomarrow?

After all life is just another dreadful
fairy tale that we have to
live in order to see the temporary "happy ending"
that was created by our stupid mind

Everyone changes

갑자기 친해졌다가 급속도로 멀어지는 사람이 있는가하면
친하지도않았는데 친해지는 사람도 있다
한사람이 떠나면 또 다른 사람이 찾아와주는법이다
그래, 한동안 너무 친했던 사람과 멀어진건 가슴이
아픈일이지만...그뒤엔 또다른 인연이있으니까
괜찮다고..위로해야지

과거에 붙잡혀있는것보단
현실을보는게 현명한 방법이니까

These days the meaning of friendship got really thin like
a thread that will break any time soon
A sudden friendship never lasts forever
on the other hand, there are some friends that
I reacently have been friends with but never knew
their existance before.
When someone leaves me another relationship between
another person forms. It is painful to let go of someone
who once have been part of me, known all me secrets but
behind that sorrow, there is another person who is waiting for me
to form another relationship.
Whether it's an friendship or love
I came to a conclusion that I shouldn't treat them
seriously as I did before.
They come by and leave quickly


Not all of them are but time just ruins everything

리쌍LeeSsang - ballerino (Feat. Ali)

The movies about this guy who can't let go of his dead lover
He bathes her, cuts her nails, and eats with her
but doesn't realize that she's dead
because she is still alive in his mind
but her body slowly decays...
he later realizes that she is actually dead and goes crazy..
A movie like this is something Masa would really like
Although it creeps the shit out of me, I have to admit that
it's a good movie and a song.
Two Thumbs up since I agree with the feeling
because I do know how it feels like letting go of someone
I have once really loved.

-

I AM FUCKEN LONELY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

보고싶어지는날엔-박지헌

Back to reality

I'm taking too many classes this semester...URGH.
but then, it's my last semester..
Now that I think about it, after all it IS OUR LAST SEMESTER...
can't believe I'm taking that many classes in my last semester..
I thought I was gonna enjoy my last semester..
well, the reality..that's not it..
I can't wait till May. Graduation, my brother's 8th grade graduation,
my burfday..and everything.
There's so much to celebrate..! yay!!
after that..I think I'm going to Korea and get some piano lessons
and party a lot! I can't wait for that..
My cousin who graduated last year and is now waiting for the college
to start spring semester..partied when I was taking art classes for
my portfolio....(he got into this one of the top colleges in Australia
for Business..)
He was telling me about how hot all the girls in the club was
and how expensive beer was..and stuffs like that..
He actually was having fun..and He made fun of me..or I guess
pitied me....WTF....
After all we are only one year apart....hello?
I guess just because he is one year older, he can enjoy life
one year faster than me...(WAT AN ADVANTAGE? huh?)
anyhow..I feel empty...
I feel like I'm leaving something out...but I don't know what..
I have been having sleeping problems...
I think my bed is really uncomfortable..
it is the worst place to sleep.............really!
I have been relieving my stress out
from punching my yellow teddy bear that K bought me....hehe
I choked it yesterday and threw it on the ground,
then picked it up when I was about to sleep LOL
I feel bad for the teddy bear...but then, he was bought by the wrong guy...
I wouldn't have tortured it if someone else bought it for me.. eh-heh
It seems like the teddy bear is running away from me..
(even though I know it can't move)

Anyhow...I hate february..
I hate the lovey dovey atmosphere..
I hate the couples hugging each other
I hate red, pastel pink colors
I hate the hearts

Although the valentine cookies from Herman's Bakary are good, mmmmm
but other than that.. I hate Valentine's day..
I think these days I'm turning emo-ish, punk ....
just by looking at the gloomy ore around me....
(I see it every morning...when I see the mirror..it freaks me out...)
I think that's why I have been putting on massive
smoky eye make-up...just to get rid of that ore....

I wonder if Ayaka's present reached Japan yet...
It was suppose to be a freaken Christmas present..but I guess it transformed into a
Valentine's present...LOL :)
I guess it goes well with Valentines than Christmas...




Picture from the past:
2006年 10月 27日 GIG;s
Northern Marianas Academy ALL HALLOW"S PARTY
with Masahide Yoshida

Look at us!! we look so young!!! X-D

Younha -Password 486

Japanese song by her
ユンナ(Younha) ~ もっとふたりで


いつもただうつむいてばかり
이츠모타다우츠무이테바카리
언제나 단지 고개숙이고 있을 뿐

一步踏み出す勇氣がなくて
입포후미다스유우키가나쿠테
한걸음 밝아나갈 용기가 없어요

そんなあたしの背中をただ
손나아타시노세나카오타다
그런 나의 등을 단지

優しくあなたが押してくれた
야사시쿠아나타가오시테쿠레타
부드럽게 당신이 밀어주었어요

泣きたくなったら泣いていいよ
나키타쿠낫타라나이테이이요
울고싶어지면 울어도좋아요

一緖に步き出そうよと
잇쇼니아루키다소오요토
함께 걸어나가자며

もっとあたしの傍にいて
못토아타시노소바니이테
더 내 옆에 있어줘요

そうもっと二人で手を繫げ
소오못토후타리데테오츠나게
그래요 좀 더 둘이서 손을 잡고

淚のあとには太陽に向かい
나미다노아토니와타이요-니무카이
눈물을 흘린 뒤에는 태양을 향해

輝く花咲かせるよ
카가야쿠하나사카세루요
빛나는 꽃을 피울 수 있어요

きっとあたしのこの先に
킷토아타시노코노사키니
반드시 나의 이 앞에

そうもっと涙がこぼれても立ち止まらないよ
소오못토나미다가코보레테모타치도마라나이요
그래요 더 눈물이 흘러넘치더라도 멈춰서지않아요

自分の花咲かせるように明日信じて
지붕노하나사카세루요오니아시타신지테
자신의 꽃을 피울 수 있도록 내일을 믿으며

この先の道步いてゆくから
코노사키노미치아루이테유쿠카라
이 앞의 길을 걸어갈테니까요

出會いも別れも知ったけど
데아이모와카레모싯타케도
만남도 이별도 알았지만

何度もさよなら済むたびに
난도모사요나라스무타비니
몇번이나 이별을 끝낼때마다

出會うことが怖くもなった
데아우코토가코와쿠모낫타
만나는것이 무서워지기도했어요

だけどやっと氣付けたんだよ
다케도얏토키즈케탄다요
그렇지만 드디어 깨달았어요

いろんな思い出 大事なこと
이론나오모이데 다이지나코토
여러가지 추억 소중한 것이

ずっと心に残るんだよ
즛토코코로니노코룬다토
쭉 마음에 남았어요

もっとあたしの胸の奥
못토아타시노무네노오쿠
좀 더 나의 마음속을

そうきっと悔し涙もほら
소오킷토쿠야시나미다모호라
그래요 꼭 후회의 눈물도

流れたあとには太陽に向かい
나가레타아토니와타이요-니무카이
흘린 뒤에는 태양을 향해

輝く花咲かせるよ
카가야쿠하나사카세루요
빛나는 꽃을 피울 수 있어요

もっと悲しいさよならが
못토카나시이사요나라가
더 슬픈 이별이

そうきっと訪れたとしても笑顔で手を振ろう
소오킷토오토즈레타토시테모에가오데테오후로오
그래요 반드시 찾아온다고해도 웃는 얼굴로 손을 흔들거에요

あなたの花咲かせるように未来信じて
아나타노하나사카세루요오니미라이신지테
당신의 꽃을 피울 수 있도록 미래를 믿으며

暖か夜蛾をあげると決めたよ
아타타카야가오아게루토키메타요
따뜻한 밤나방을 주기로 결심했어요

もっとあたしの傍にいて
못토아타시노소바니이테
더 내 옆에 있어줘요

そうもっと二人で手を繫げ
소오못토후타리데테오츠나게
그래요 좀 더 둘이서 손을 잡고

淚のあとには太陽に向かい
나미다노아토니와타이요-니무카이
눈물을 흘린 뒤에는 태양을 향해

輝く花咲かせるよ
카가야쿠하나사카세루요
빛나는 꽃을 피울 수 있어요

きっとあたしのこの先に
킷토아타시노코노사키니
반드시 나의 이 앞에

そうもっと涙がこぼれても立ち止まらないよ
소오못토나미다가코보레테모타치도마라나이요
그래요 더 눈물이 흘러넘치더라도 멈춰서지않아요

自分の花咲かせるように明日信じて
지붕노하나사카세루요오니아시타신지테
자신의 꽃을 피울 수 있도록 내일을 믿으며

今日も一歩づつ踏み出していくよ
쿄오모입포즈츠후미다시테이쿠요
오늘도 한걸음씩 걸어나갈거에요

recent pictures of me

I have realized that I didn't do much updates so
I decided to take lots of pics yesterday
and these are the result..
my bangs are long....I might grow it..or
wait until I go to Korea to cut it and give some coloring to it
I dunno what I'm gonna do..but I'm planning to
color it orange and straighten my bangs or something..

I have been gaining weight recently..from all that munching!!!!
you can see that from the pictures..so I decided to make the picturs
dark to hide all that...hehe

The hat is from this bakery in Korea
where they gave out hats to people who bought a cake..

I Think I am in Love with this guy

He definitely looks like someone I know but I don't know who
but recently I started to like this guy
his name: So Ji Sub

I have realized that women, when they grow older,the fall for the guys who
have nice body...and I think I am starting to like guys who have hot bodies..
WTF...I mean like last year I was in love with guys who are skinnier than
women and now..I'm in love with guys who have the body...
what a big change.......!





Big BANG's new song "Last farewell" M/V
about this guy living two different life
he's a geek during the day and a hot guy at night
and the girl doesn't know it's the same guy...hehe funny movie
LOVE their song!!!

Another Whole New Semester

These days I'm just thankful that I am still living
and that I didn't kill myself as I was planning to when I was
seriously into depression. Thank God!!
You don't even know how many times I held that knife and put it back..

These days I'm coming back to normal..
Over the whole drama with my Ex-boyfriend thingy
and the whole revenge that I have planned with my small evil mind
Whatever. I just want everyone to be happy

I don't know if any of you will believe but I'm trying my best to be a bit nice.
I try not to say much bad words as possible and I try a lot to be nice to many people..
I know that sounds like not me but I am really trying

Enough drama..seriously I think it's not even good for my health..
I think I'm becoming more healthier compared to the last time..
Last semester I really felt sick and fucked up
I screwed up a lot. I smoked and I did a lot of things that fucked me up
after all that shit I became a healthy person.. ( I think..)

I came to a realization that I only have 4 monthes left..
and that just makes me sick to my stomach.
I really want to leave this place and get a slight taste of freedom
but at the same time it's really scary because I easily get homesick..
I constantly want to come back to where I belong..
I try so hard to adapt and yet I just can't let go the place I was born and raised.
I mean I do adapt to the enviornment but at the back of my mind
I have a strong desire to come back..and it misses my hometown..
I don't even know where all the "I won't come back after I leave this place"

I am thankful for little things and I am happy that I am with people I love so much
I am also thankful that I learned another valuable lesson from
all that crap that I had to go through..
I learned a lot and I became a stronger person.
It created another whole new me that I need
in order to live through out this harsh world.

my foremost goal for this semester is getting all A's
Forget about making boyfriend shit..
I am through that... (Eun Ji thinks I am Bi...WTF)
anyhow I just don't want to screw up my last semester
I have to succeed...I don't want to be a loser again...
I don't want to be a loser to someone who is a bigger loser than me
I have put too much attention into.....
Someone who doesn't deserve my attention
Someone who is a total failure
Someone who is more f-ed up than me
Someone who has no proper thinking devise
(or maybe it doesn't function well..either way..)
Someone who is immature
Someone who acts like my dog Banny

Done with it...
and I don't need another wierd semester..
I am through messing with my mind



Song I have been listening to these days
"Stop this train" by John Mayer

The book Slave to Fashion

Actually, in my experience ugliness does
something horrid to the soul. Knowing that whoever your're
talking to can only think, God, but she's ugly, must burn
into you like acid. Unless you're especially stupid.
Which makes it all the sadder that pretty people are so often
dim, and ugly ones clever. ( I know it's a cliche, but cliches
get to be cliches because they're true. Sometimes, anyway)
Hugh once gave me a very good piece of advice. I don't know
where he got it from. "Katie," he said, "always tell pretty girls
that they're clever, and clever girls that they're pretty. They'll
love you forever."
"And what do you say if they're pretty and clever?" I asked.
He smiled and patted me on the bottom. "You say yes,
Katie. You say yes." Naughty man.




(Part where I really agreed)

To my waiting fans

haha I guess that will be Ayaka, Chett
and rest of my friends who love my blog
(am I getting myself wrong..or what...hehe)

oh I had a really hectic winter vacation because
I realized that I had no time for myself and focused
(not really but little bit) more on my portfolio for college

right now I am finished with RISD,PRATT, Parsons, UCLA, AAU
but I still need to get my transcript for UCLA and I need to call
Pratt to see what's up cuz they sent this letter to me (actually to my dad)
that I am missing a essay but when I checked with my teacher
I didn't miss anything because they only essay they required
was a personal essay and I did write that......so don't know
what is going on..hmmm

*these are the latest pics of me..when I was in my academy
thinking of what to draw and the other one was...I was kinda shy to take
picture...I think...*







right now I am finally home!
HOME SWEET HOME!!!! I am so glad that all that shit is over
and I am home..
I couldn't sleep for 3 days....because I came back this morning
so it's actually 4 days...and today was the registration for NMC...
so it was really hectic..and I am really tired!!! I waited for 5 hours...

oh, and to Ayaka..
I didn't send the present yet..because I was soooooo busy
but I did buy the present...(really !!)
I will either give it to masa or I will send it off this week
so if you wait for another week patiently..like you did right now
I think you will get it!! *WINK sorry for the lateness...
I LUV YA!!!



2008 first blog end!